When a restless mind comes, I don’t want just to stay still. I want to dance with the rain, I want to walk within the wind. When a restless mind comes, I just can’t let myself being alone.
Memory
The first time we met, I though I saw a fairy standing in front of me. Came from a sacred forest which I never heard of nor ever imagined of. You walked gently to me, as if your steps never touched the ground, as if you were hovering gently toward me. As if you owned those legendary colourless wings of the fairies.
Even when my awareness walk in present time, sometime there definitely a question comes by, whether I’ve taken the right path, the exact turn, or whether I still hold my shadow far behind within the lost past. There is time when I stand, and look around, only to see nothing but a glimpse of nothingness.
Tonight, I watch again this old animation about a girl with her dream to see the flying lights. Its bringing back so much memory. I think since the storyline so sincere.
I heard the sound, the sound of falling leaves sake their surrounding air gently, the sound of broken streams along just bellow the spring. I saw you were writing – a simple wish of this long journey, a vast dream beyond the very heaven could reach.
How long I have stood here, all the past seems has not changed at all into present. The same scarlet sky, the similar humid thin air, and this warm breeze out of nowhere. This floating feeling, this lightened breath, and this softened ground. How long I have stood here.
I have no story, I have no sonnet, and I have no poetry. This path is just a simple void between my days and nights, between my awareness and my ignorance. And by its’ nature, it has become a quiet path.
I remember clearly, the void, the smell of morning grass and land in the thick of morning mist. It was not unusual morning, neither a special one, it just a common early morning, right before the sun were about to raise gently. And I believe everyone must have ever seen this kind of morning once in a life time, at least.
When I met you on the crossed twilight of past, I know the fate already has scrambling my heart. I know old people said, “love shall never can be found, so seeking is futile, but even love would surely found you, waiting is obvious futile too.”
There was no peculiar moment, nor any strange aura or unbelievable fate either. There was only you and me.
I remember if some friends I met after a long time, they would say something like, “Hey…, you have been change a lot”, otherwise, “Gezz, look at yourself, you didn’t change at all.”
I don’t really know what was they seen in me back in the past. Or they just simply say some changed or unchanged things just as a spontaneous respond.
I have met rain this afternoon, suddenly they fall freely when my steps still far enough from that silhouette I call home. Its been awhile since the last time I walked under the afternoon rain. When nothing urge to be done which need me to keep myself dry – I prefer to have a walk home, even under the rain.
Well, I used to life in the middle of rice fields, rain often chough me when I far from home – no building, no tree, no shelters, it just rice fields everywhere. So, I just let myself enjoyed walking home under the rain.
